"Yes, How can I help you" - she said

“Aaaahhhhhh !!! Not again !” I moaned. The reason – The middle aged guy who was sitting at the reception sofa of the company that we were visiting, got up from his seat, brushed his hair with his fingers and made his way towards the receptionist lady. Whats wrong with that ? one may ask. Let me tell you.

The Receptionists -

Receptionists – are an interesting ilk. Most of the firms have a receptionist who sits at the visitor’s area of the office and presides over the phone/EPABX system and invariably a computer. Now this receptionist most of the times is a female and that is when the things get interesting. I being in the profession of enterprise sales, have to come across a new receptionist every day since I visit at least a new company each day. Everyday a new woman ! Everyday a new dialogue ! (Hey , that just sounds more cheap that it actually is)

It’s so interesting to watch these receptionists interact with the visitors at their place. It’s my favourite pastime when I am waiting for my meetings. Each lady had a different way of handling things, different way to putting across the message to the visitors. And most importantly if the lady is pretty or even decently good looking, then its even more fun watching them. We men behave funny when we are in the presence of a beautiful lady… oh come on , now who are you trying to fool… we all do !! nobody is a saint here. Some men remain natural and some men put on an artificial swagger. But the bottomline is, all of us are very very aware of the feminine presence in the room.

It’s very essential that these ladies who ‘man’ the reception, have a thick skin since they have to face a whole lot of varied visitors who range from gentlemen to rogues. The biggest amusement for me is when these receptionists get hit upon by the men around. Oh boy ! The very nature of their job demands them to be polite and ever smiling. And when a receptionist does that, the men invariably take it in a different sense and start getting goosebumps. Just one smile and they get all worked up and think that the woman is liking him and that the smile and the polite way of talking is an indication of this ‘ great attraction ‘ !

Deeply observing

The meetings that you have at all the new offices in the city are a nice way to meet different people. Everyday I come across so many new people. Many a times, I just effortlessly shift from my ‘business mode’ to ‘ observation’ mode and then what I see and what I realize is fantastic. The way in which the visitor behave with the receptionist is again a study in itself. The receptionist get so much of unwanted attention that sometimes it is hard not to sympathize with them.

The incidents

Once when I was sitting at a customer place I happened to notice a guy talking very animatedly to the receptionist. He was saying how he was friends with the old receptionist and how he thought that she was a good receptionist too. He was buttering her big time and she was smiling and putting up with him. She was a pretty lady and I could easily see that all the people passing by were noticing her. I am a regular visitor to that firm and having been there so often, I used to see her tackling a few visitors who used to show some extra interest in her. Sometimes it was amusing and sometimes downright vulgar.

Even once when I had been there with a very senior colleague of mine, I noticed how he got all excited on seeing her. He suddenly would fiddle with his hair and put in place before approaching her for something or the other. Normally he would have asked me to do all these things. Also he would smile while entering, smile while passing by and smile while leaving. It sometimes becomes so hilarious. In the process, I stopped greeting her or talking to her. I would always try and avoid her. I just wanted to pass on the message to her that I was not gonna fall for her charms and that I was more professional and cared two hoots about her.

Small things !
But invariably, dear readers, I would find people who would try and flirt around with these receptionists. Even married men, like one of my colleagues are not devoid of this trait. He is quite a decent guy who has a loving wife back home whom he adores and a charming son. He hardly stares at women when like some guys do and I never thought of him to be a person who would be even remotely interested in other women. But he too would sometimes behave a bit too eager when the receptionist was very beautiful. Not that he would flirt with her. For that matter not many flirt with the receptionists. All they do is some small things that to a trained eye like mine are easy give-aways. For instance they would go and enquire frequently with the receptionist. They would unnecessarily ask for directions, would ask doubts, would repeatedly glance at her through the newspapers that they are reading, greet the lady at each instance etc etc etc.

From within too !!!

Even the employees of the same organization are not much different. They somehow think that the receptionist at the entrance is some lesser soul or a bit harshly put, ‘loose’ than the other ‘professionals’ working with them in their team. While taking a break from work, they will openly come and chit-chat with the receptionist lady without a care for her time. They think that a receptionist does not have any work and that she is there to make the workplace more likeable. Balls !!

For instance, once I saw this guy come up to the visitors area and wait for some colleague of his before leaving for the cafeteria. He came straight to the receptionist lady who again was a stunner and started asking her questions. “ Nice flowers you have got here. “ I could see from her reaction that she was not amused by his arrival and that she would be facing his nuisance very often. She replied, “ My husband sent it for me.” Although he was a bit taken aback at this, he quickly recovered and observed, “your husband must love you very much to send you such expensive flowers”. “ Yes he does love me. Why don’t you send your wife flowers as well?” She suggested and now I could sense some tension between them both. “My wife is not as nice as your na, madam “ he shamelessly replied.

I was shocked at his reply. What did he expect? He himself was a hideous creature as far as looks go. To add to that he gave very negative vibes. Did he expect some beautiful girl to come and take him in his arms. Even seemingly nice guys, who are good looking, decently dressed, well mannered and intelligent, sometimes behave in this manner too. I have gone to so many IT/ITeS firms that its easy for me to be exposed to these things sometime or the other on my visits. These decent guys also come and chit-chat with the receptionists as if she is some joker meant to entertain everybody. All expect her to smile and talk nicely to her. All expect her to go out of the way and accommodate their wishes. “ can you call up xyz and tell him blah blah blah?” or “can you please fix an appointment for me with the dentist?” or outrageous request like “ can you come with me to the supermarket to help me shop since I do not know the local language?” or “ come with me for coffee na, none of my team mates are here with me and I don’t want to go alone”.

DUUUUUUhhhhhhhhhhh !! come on men ! We can be much better than that ! Please !
I mean its nothing wrong to be attracted to a pretty lady. But then we meet so many pretty women all the time, everyday. Does that mean that we all have to behave in the silly manner all the time with each one of them? Are they there only for our entertainment? They too have work, they too have pressure to complete their work. And just because they smile and talk to you and glance at you does not mean that they are giving you hints. It might also mean that they are being nice to a visitor to the firm and also that they are just checking if the visitor is comfortable, is he still waiting and if so, then whom should she inform so that visitors are attended to by the concerned employees at the firm.

I have heard this even with people who travel by airlines. They think that the airhostesses are liking him and so showering all their attention on him. Come on…. ITS HER JOB TO LOOK AFTER YOU. It does not mean that she is interested in you. These women in the service industry are also normal women like any that you come across in your teams. They are not loose characters who will fall for the next guy walking through the door. Women today are not like the archetypal women of the past who would not utter a word to a stranger. Today women are not shy and speak uninhibitedly with any stranger. So its base for us men to think of her to be gyrating to our ‘ charms’ … oh how funny and how childish. !!!

Anyway !!!

The point is – we all behave differently with the pretty receptionists. And I feel – there is no need to.
Be normal. She appreciates it more than you showering all her with all attention and trying to impress her with the importance that you hold in your organization. ( oh did I mention about the way in which some visitors announce to the receptionst – “ Please tell Mr. x that ‘abc’, ‘blah blah Manager’ from “pqr pvt ltd” is here to see him” They think they are impressing the poor lady with their name and designation)


I have met some pretty good people during my visits to the various organizations and they are all receptionists – male and female. Each time I go, I greet them and they too greet me. We sometimes chit-chat, sometimes we don’t even look at each other. It all depends on the time, situation and the work on our hands. Its always like that. Many receptionist among these are women who are either recently married, or compelting 30 years of marriage, or married with 2 kids, or even men with 2 kids, men who have migrated to Bangalore and picked up English and now are manning the desk proficiently like any efficient woman receptionist.
They are all humans and they are all doing their jobs. To think of them as lesser women who are there for our taking is to insult them and to insult their choice of careers. I know many of them have even Masters degrees in Engineering, Philosphy, Political Science, Journalism, Biotech, etc and still they have chosen this profession. Why ? Well its their personal wish. All I request is that we must not paint them all with the same brush. The lady in my organization is one of the best employees of my organization and she can easily be given far far greater responsibilities ( she executes some complex and highly skilled tasks with silent ease and efficiency when faced with some emergency situations) But she is content doing what she is currently doing. She has her reasons and I respect that. WE ALL MUST.

The essence of my post is that – the post or the nature of the work that a woman is doing, must not be a criterion for us to respect or not respect her. I might even extrapolate to even men. Let’s not behave in such base and insulting manner whenever we meet them next. Lets be natural and show them that as men we respect them and do not wish to take advantage of their position. Instead we want to let their cheerful and pleasant disposition affect us in a positive and limited way so that we have a nice image of the organization that we are visiting.
Is that too difficult a thing to ask for fellas ?


Disclaimer: If I have used any terms that does not seem justified especially to women readers, then please feel free to point it out. I have not written this with any particular agenda in mind. And yeah, this is the post that i was referring to in my rubbish previous post...coming attraction, feminine distraction. Period.