My morning Tea is too cold to gulp!

I finish sleeping ( yeah, it’s a big task for me, STILL!!!) and head for a cup of tea at the neighbourhood tea shop. The air is nippy and the breeze is chilling. Bangalore is cold. I have got my nice branded jacket to keep warm. I am sipping the brown drink, and suddenly I see something near my knees. No, it’s not my brain ( my brain is in my feet  - that’s meant to be a joke, in case u didn’t get it)
I am amazed to see a 3 year old girl who has come to the shop with a 1 rupee coin in her hand. In her other hand, she is holding a baby. The baby is 1 year old at the max., their attire, or rather lack of it, made me sit up and take notice. The elder girl is wearing a green frock with frills. The back side has a zip without a zipper. So her back is exposed to the ruthless winter. Its almost a frightening sight – a flimsy rag , an excuse for a frock, acting as the only protection for the little girl against the vagaries of the winter chill! The kid sitting happily on her elder sister’s hips, is even more of a heroine. She is wearing a small white colour shirt over her upper body and is stark naked below her hips ! Imagine ! A one year old child, who is half naked, wandering around in the open with the temperatures being 14-16 degrees Celsius. And here is this 25 year old, athletic and healthy chap, all draped up in three layers of clothing to ‘protect’ him from the cold! I was ashamed of myself ! I felt like digging a deep hole and burying myself into it.
She asked the shopkeeper, in some language, (maybe baby language) for something but was told by the shopkeeper that whatever she asked for costs Rs. 2. I think she asked for some biscuits ( maybe Parle-G ) and was denied , as she had only Rs. 1 with her. The poor child turns and heads back to her hutment nearby. The child on her hips, is still wondering as to why she did not get her munch. And here was I, on to my second cup of tea, which I ordered, just because it was cold, and I feel tea helps to keep you warm. Warm from what, man? Heck, I was now feeling all sick and ashamed of myself. Felt like throwing away all my clothes! Was it my ego? Or was it my ultra sensitive nature? I dunno. I didn’t feel I deserved the comfort that I was in.
No longer has she gone, and there walks in the Rajnikanth of the locality. This is another 3-4 year old boy living in the same hutments as the green frock lady that I met a minute back. I have seen this fellow before too. He has one of the cutest faces and walks with a swagger that is unique to him. He has bright eyes and a round face. He is wearing, again to my dismay - am exhausted to be shocked, by now-, a flimsy T-shirt and a knee length shorts . Again he is also clutching a ten rupee note in his hand. He comes and asks for a packet of some provision, I believe. The shopkeeper again says no and the little fella moves on to another shop. My eyes refuse to revert from him and my legs follow my eyes. I am drawn to the boy with the magnetic personality. He again returns from this shop too, empty-handed. He is walking on his toes, since he cannot bear to let his bare feet touch the cold pavement near the shops. I again feel ashamed ! I have got again a nice pair of branded sandals on my feet.
I am not sure if I feel pity for these poor kids, forced to bear the brunt of this cold or for myself who in spite of being decades elder to them, cannot stop acting like a sissy and ‘ooh” , “aah” about the cold in Bangalore. I ask the shopkeeper , “why can’t you just give the kid the biscuits… after all its just a matter of one rupee? The kid is poor na !” But the shopkeeper told me that if he keeps giving such liberties to them, then the next thing he would have to face is a horde of such poor labourers’ kids swarming his store and asking for such discounts. It’s a valid argument. That’s the sad part of life! Good intentions may not work out as you want and sometimes the heart-felt thing is not the right thing to do. I mean sometimes, what the heart says is not the right way to do things. How sad ! Now I could have easily paid the shopkeeper the balance money and let the kids have their biscuits… but then I refrained from doing so. Why? I honestly do not know. Something inside prevented me from doing it. No, not the least because of the fear of losing my money ( Phuullleeeeezzzz !) I will not be there all the time, and so there is no point in me helping her out only this once. It was the same logic as – “Instead of giving the hungry man a fish, teach him how to fish!”
But all said and done, I still go all decked up in wool and leather for my morning cup of tea, and such small kids still come there once in a while during the morning time for something or the other and I still feel ashamed of myself and admire those kids for their resilience and courage. Its hits me in the gut everytime I see them there and I still do not do anything about it. But again I have never felt like doing anything for such destitute and poor. It’s a shameful admission…. Am I so bad… why do I still go there , have my two rounds of tea, dress up like I am trekking the Mt. Everest and watch the half naked, shivering kids , not even get a decent cup of tea !!!! Why have I become so immune to everything that happens !!!